The other day I was browsing through a Home Economics book from the 1940's. The author had a chart on how often to clean the house. Totally clean the kitchen and bathrooms daily. Clean hallways, bedrooms, and living room twice a week. Etc. I bemoaned to my best friend that we don't have standards any more. I didn't want to clean that much; I don't really value an incredibly clean house. Something in me just wanted the peer pressure towards margin and order.
My best friend remarked that we do have cultural standards: we don't clean, we don't have time for relationships, we eat out too much, we bond with others over our schedule horror stories. Egads, I think she's right.
And being the intrinsic rebel, I begin to look for an opportunity to move against the culture. I've been mulling it over for a few days, and I don't have any huge answers. I have a couple of observations.
If we willingly choose to participate in our culture (and we all have choices), let's do so with purpose. When I was working, I would sometimes put in 50-hour weeks. My husband and kids were very committed to what I was doing. We didn't do a lot of upkeep on the house. We didn't socialize with friends much. The house wasn't always clean. But we knew why we kept the pace we did; we had a strong sense of purpose. Crazy and purposeful isn't necessarily terrible, do you think? But crazy for the sake of crazy, without any thought...that seems a little dangerous.
The other observation: it's okay to say no. I was supposed to get together with a friend on Monday to do some cooking. It was an opportunity to get some work done and be together. A very good idea. But I'm too tired, and my days have been snowballing lately. I needed a break, so I called her and offered coffee instead. The other gift I gave my friend was not being guilty for needing to change our plans. I'm going to be a rebel against our culture; I'm going to make it okay to choose something less, instead of always more more more.
Since my culture offers me no pressure towards margin and order, I'll make a little of my own. Or at least live thoughtfully. How about you?
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