The courses I take

I learned a lot in school. I liked learning. But after graduating from college, I have learned the most from my friends. Over the years, I have come to believe that God brings new relationships into my life with the purpose of teaching me something. Each person that God brings to me is like enrolling in a new course, something with a vague title that makes you really curious what you're going to get. . .What would you expect from a course simply named Susie?

My friend Julie loved to promote her birthday. She would remind everyone when her birthday was, ask what you planned to get for her, etc. I loved her exuberance. Her example helped me to throw off my shyness about my "special day", when I expected others to make it a "great day" for me and I just humbly received their kindness. I learned to be loud and assume people loved me and wanted to be kind to me. It was a lesson that carried beyond just an annual celebration.

My friend Bonnie taught me that people can change. When we met, I was listening to talk radio and coming from a very politically polarized environment. I was quite good at categorizing people, and once I had you pegged, my expectations for you were set. Bonnie used to say out loud, "People change," and I would think, "No, they don't." But a friend helps you see the world from another perspective, and just from simple conversation I began to see things more how she sees them. I have learned to hope the best for people and expect God's best for them, assuming that his gentle love can wear on all of our hearts. And in our friendship, we discuss our own growth all the time. As I hope for my own change and have the humility to admit that I do change, I see people around me differently.

My friend Ginny has taught me how to screw up publicly and laugh it off. (I know, Bonnie, you thought you taught me this. . .) She says & does the most ridiculous things, and there are many times people really laugh AT her and not WITH her. But I have noticed that she brings the sweet aroma of freedom into any room she enters, and she enjoys her own mistakes right along with yours. The other day, everyone laughed at something stupid I said in community group, and I felt like Ginny. I felt free of my own perfectionism and the need to control my image. Joy!

Judy has taught me to value the zeal of youth, no matter how many years we collect. Bethany has taught me to be hungry to learn, to say, "I don't understand, please explain." Jennifer has taught me that it's okay to cry in front of people. My list can go on and on. . .

But the main point is this: none of these dear people set out to teach me anything. God is about the business of building my character, and he uses people around me to do so. They don't need to have any intentions towards me. . .although, a good general sense of honesty does help! Remember when God said, "Look at my servant Job"? Remember when the apostle Paul said, "Follow my example"? Those statements seem a bit scary, but it's not really up to us to model or teach. If God wants to use us, he can, and it may be he uses us to teach something we didn't even know we had to give. Maybe that's the best kind.