Parenting is like creating your own universe. You decide the rules: bedtime, when to get up, when and what your kids eat, what is okay and what is a no-no. Your children see you as omnipotent and omniscient. You are the world to them. This seems a little daunting sometimes, but I kinda got used to being in control of the world. I made a pretty good world.
Then my kids got older. Last week I confiscated all the cell phones in the car just because they were annoying me. I needed five minutes without texting. When my fifteen year old handed hers over, I realized that she was obeying me not because she thought it was a good idea, but because it was my universe. I saw myself as a very fickle god.
Our family vacation was great, but I still struggle with seeing the glass half empty sometimes. Noticing the problems is natural to me. I saw a lot of things in me that were petty or small or less than I would like. In my own family, the world of my own making, these things were amplified. My flaws are picked up in my children's behavior; they are reflected in the rules that I make that govern my family. Now that my kids are older, my flaws are very often pointed out to me. Eek.
Not to switch the subject, but have you noticed God's universe? He created a world with boundaries (the sun rising & setting, the food we have to eat, the seasons). He created a world with rules. He disciplines and acts in a way that magnifies who He is. But God managed to create a universe where He looks good (hmmm...maybe because He IS good?). When given the opportunity, I didn't pull things off quite so well.
2 comments:
A thought: We look at our kids and wish they wouldn't look so much like us. God looks at us and wishes we would resemble him in any way. I guess we need to try to make our kids look like him and not like us. Novel thought!
That was a lovely post. A little humbling. Yesterday my daughter compared me to a character in a show that I didn't like. It was somewhat painful - and helpful.
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