Mary, did you know?

At least once during the Christmas season, I spontaneously burst into tears over a Christmas song. Usually, it's "Mary, Did You Know?" but today it was something similar: "You're Here" by Francesca Battistelli.

The line, "I'll be watching when you change the world" is what started me blubbering. My children are poised on the edge of adulthood. I want to watch them change the world. I've worked to teach them what that looks like: loving people, not seeking your own glory, serving others, listening, committing. I'm not sure if any of us get a "big assignment." We're each a part of the church, this amazing organism that is Jesus Christ in a hurting world.

But what did it look like, for Mary, when Jesus changed the world?

I was talking with one of my girls about Christianity in the car the other day. We were talking about how deeply she questions her beliefs, and I simply reassured her: if you seek God, you will find Him. By asking questions, you are making sure that the foundation for your life is solid and worth building on. A solid foundation is worth having, so ask away. She knows that there are claims on your life when you follow God. She struggles with the truth that, as a Christian, you can't just do whatever you want.

We have three desires for our daughters' future spouses: 1) be kind and respectful, 2) follow Jesus, and 3) be willing and able to support a family. My daughter said that she hoped she would be attractive to a Christian, even though she questions God so much.

My heart cried out, "Oh, yes, baby. You will be attractive to the kind of man you will need." I really believe that each of my children will grow up to change the world, just because they are so alive and beautiful. They are salt and light. Wherever God takes them, they will bring healing, preservation, and a brightness that is in them because of God.

The world, however, can be harsh and ugly. And I think the world will hurt them. I've watched it already in the "safe" environment of school and church.

So when Francesca Battistelli sings, "But I'll be watching when you change the world," I think of Mary at a distance as Jesus is being scourged. I think of her watching him impaled on a cross and hanging naked like a criminal.

Because He was saving us.

She had a few people around her who were heartbroken with her, but her heart was so shattered that God warned her in advance what was coming (Luke 2:35), just so she would know that this was not beyond Him: it was actually the plan.

If I want the Lord to work in the lives of my children, my expectations should be the same as Mary's. I do not believe that they are guaranteed health, wealth, and happiness; I believe that God wants to touch people, and my child will be a part of that. And it might hurt.

"For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him" (Philippinas 1:29). It has been granted.

"Son though he was, he learned obedience through what he suffered" (Hebrews 5:8).

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you [or your children] face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything" (James 1:2-4).